Two nights ago, I spent my evening jumping off the couch every 5 minutes to answer the door and dole out candy to witches and vampires and Superman himself. Tonight? I'm back on my couch...watching Christmas movies.

That's right, the 2nd of November and Hallmark Channel has already begun to air its Christmas movies. In fact, Target began putting out their Christmas wares earlier this week, and Central Market's foyer already sports a fully decorated Christmas tree. I like Christmas as much as the next girl, but give me a break. Can we not hold off just a bit? Do we have to stretch out the great American shopping spree over a two month period instead of just the one? Could we not give Thanksgiving--the slightly less decorated, but no less appetizing holiday--a chance to happen?

I've never understood the way we sort of gloss over Thanksgiving the past few years. I mean, this is a holiday revolving around food, so you would think Americans could get behind that. And it's about family, which we all claim to value. And it is completely American, which seems to be important to a large part of the electorate these days. So why doesn't Thanksgiving get the time on the court that Christmas does? Or Halloween? Or Valentine's Day? All of those get a whole aisle dedicated to their festivities in the grocery store, for cryin' out loud. Thanksgiving? It gets a couple of endcaps with boxes of StoveTop Stuffing and cans of can-shaped cranberry sauce. Honestly, it's pretty pathetic.

I mean, I get that the color scheme leaves something to be desired. (Not every one can pull off orange, yellow, and brown.) I know an ugly (and often belligerent) bird is the mascot rather than a cute little cherub, or a grandfatherly toy maker, or a giant fuzzy bunny. And I freely admit that a frequently dry hunk of poultry isn't nearly as inspiring as a box of chocolates or an edible house made from sugar and spice and everything nice. But still, America, where is your sense of decency, your love of family, your belief in equality?!

Can't Candace Cameron (all grown out of her Growing Pains) and her handmade (and utterly underwhelming) nutcrackers wait a couple of weeks for their annual premiere? I bet Tom Arnold could play the owner of Turkey Town just as easily as he plays the Santa of Santa Town.

Because,you see, I am getting older. And the years are going by faster every day. And I want my fall holidays, even if it is 90 degrees outside. And I want a holiday that involves one shopping trip to one store, and everyone eating around a table instead of a TV, and no one getting shot over a damn XBOX.

Bring back Thanksgiving, America. Lord knows none of us really has the money we inevitably spend on Christmas presents. So, let's put the chore of finding a spot in the mall parking lot off for another month and focus on the pleasures of making handprint turkeys and pumpkin pie. Let's watch the leaves change before we start putting the lights on the trees.

Let's take a moment to be reflective...before we take a month to be overindulgent.