I must admit that since the weather has been colder, I have pretty much abandoned my morning run. When it's 14 degrees outside, something in my little body overrides all sense of athleticism (which, as anyone who knows me can attest, is rather limited to begin with) and forces me to snuggle deeper under my micro-fleece sheets (yeah, you read that right: micro-fleece sheets!) and hit the snooze button a couple more times. Consequently, my wee body is getting less wee every day, and I haven't seen those early morning hours from any vantage outside my bed in several weeks.

This morning? I woke up at 3:28...on my own...and I have been unable to get back to sleep. So here I am getting re-acquainted with my old friend 4 a.m. He hasn't seemed to change much, to tell you the truth. Except for the fact that he's freakin' 16 degrees!

Now, I recognize that there are parts of my proud country that are hitting -25 or some ridiculousness like that. But I don't live there. My people were apparently made for warmer climates, so we get our extreme weather at, well, the other extreme. I can handle the heat (as long as there is shade and sunscreen). At least with 100+ degree summers you don't have to worry about pipes bursting or frostbite on your walk to work or treacherous driving conditions. You drink lots of water, you siesta in the middle of the afternoon, you run your ceiling fans.

To be frank, I'm actually a little miffed that I'm having to deal with both ends of the thermometer spectrum. I mean, those folks in Iowa may be shoveling snow every other day right now in the sub-zero afternoons, but how many 100+ days are they going to have to sweat out this summer?

Which is why, in a stroke of 4 a.m. brilliance, I have decided that I must now devise a plan to move somewhere with more consistent temperatures...like Hawaii or Bora Bora. That, or I must find a way to earn a living from the comfort of a non-drafty, climate-controlled home in a neighborhood that offers more than 4 varieties of delivery food.

Or, there is always the lottery, which has been my Plan A for quite some time now, and which I would happily spend $5 on if buying the tickets didn't require opening my front door to the 16 degree world outside.

Plan B it is then: stay under woobie, on couch, with mini-heater on and book in hand for entire day. Completely do-able.