What does it say about me that in the past three months three of my closest friends have all called to tell me they thought of me when they saw this commercial:



They think I am a snuggie person! I am not a snuggie person!

Last night my oldest friend in the world, calls me close to 10:00 to tell me that she just saw this commercial and that every time she passes theses things at Walgreen's she thinks about buying one for me. A cheap fleece blanket with giant sleeves makes my best friend think of me. This cannot be a good thing.

I admit that I am extremely cold-natured. I can't help the fact that nature did not provide me with much in the way of insulation. This is one of the many reasons I live in Texas and not in Wisconsin. I know my thermal limitations, and I know I could not survive a northern winter. Colorado is as far north as I ever hope to live, and even that will require much in the way of long-johns and turtlenecks.

I'll admit, my wardrobe choices tend toward winter wear: I have an extensive collection of sweaters, and my coat closet isn't sitting empty, by any means. It might be also true that I own 6 or 7 pairs of flannel pajamas (all very stylish of course) that I may wear until well into April. I may own about 10 pairs of fuzzy socks (aka muppet feet) in a variety of patterns and colors, and one pair may even be microwaveable (gift from ExBF) for times when I can't seem to get my feet warm.

I sleep with a down blanket on the bed year-round, and in the colder months, there are flannel or fleece sheets under it and a heavy comforter on top. And yes, I do have a chenille throw ("woobie", in honor of my somewhat crazy mother) that I usually curl up under when I watch Truman, my Tivo. But it does not have sleeves!

I am not a snuggie kind of girl.

First of all, I don't knit. I've been trying to crochet the same damn scarf for the last three winters, and I just cannot make myself work on it for more than 10 minutes without my getting distracted. Yarn work is just not a priority in my life.

Secondly, I do not throw fits like a 4-year-old. Did you see the way the woman gets frustrated when she has to answer the phone and she has to get her hands out of the blanket? I would never do that. If I were that cold and that into my TV show and the phone rang, I would let it go to voicemail until such a time as I could comfortably call them back. I am not so emotionally needy that the ability to take every phone call must weigh in on my choice of couch accessories.

Third, I do not regularly attend football games, and on the rare occasions that I do, I have an adorable fleece football blanket (bought as a school fundraiser several years back, as a matter of fact) that will suit me just fine, as I am not really the type to jump up and throw everything off my lap to cheer my team to victory. The team for the school I currently work for wins 99.9% of their games anyway, so it's not all that unexpected when they score.

Finally, I am not old. Watching that commercial, I do not see any young, attractive, single-women-types wearing a snuggie. Let's face it, snuggies are not sexy. They are the epitome of homeliness, and, in my book, just one small step away from a dozen cats and a pink housecoat with matching slip-on houseshoes you buy at the grocery store. Snuggies do not project the appropriate image for someone dangling her toes back in the dating pool.

I appreciate the fact that you all seem so concerned with my physical comfort. Really I do. But I am thinking long-term here. I would much rather have someone's arms around me under the blanket than a monkish blanket with arms of its own.